I knew my sister wasn't doing good and shortly after midnight I received the call that my sister's fight with cancer was over. She had passed peacefully in her sleep. I laid in bed feeling numb. I knew this day was coming and not sure how I felt. I felt a bit selfish for not grieving more or even crying. I must have fallen asleep at some point as my alarm clock woke me for work. I knew that I wasn't going to go in today as I wanted to spend some time with my other two sisters, but before I do that I felt I had to put something down in writing and share with others my thoughts and pictures.
So here I am sitting in my favorite chair working on my laptop. I have cartoons on in the background while I try to put my thoughts together. What should I say or even do and while these thoughts run through my mind I start to cry.
We had a normal child hood like most kids, but as Vicky went into high school things changed in our home. I won't get into that here, I will only say that Vicky ended up leaving with her boyfriend and future husband to Missouri. I will only see her a few times over the next 25 years as we grew somewhat apart. We did not maintain a close sister / brother relationship and now that she is gone I am regretting that we didn't talk more. That is why the time we spent together recently during her visits and our vacation to Havasu mean so much and I will always hold close to my heart.
Vicky, know that I love you and will miss you dearly. I know that you have found peace and are being taken care of.
Vicky's Senior Portrait
The Bradley's
Shortly after hearing that Vicky had cancer our mom and dad went out to visit with her.
Vicky was able to come out to California a few times and during one of those times I was able to get some nice portriats of her.
I thank God for the time we spent together in Havasu. Even though her life was filled with uncertainty she lived it to it's fullest.
You will be missed, I love you.........
Sept 24, 1962 - Sept 25, 2009
42 comments:
My thoughts and prayers are with you. What a remarkable woman your sister was!
Jim, I'm so sorry. I remember you talking about her when she had come out for her last visit. My thoughts are with you and your family.
I'm sorry, Jim. :( I'm sure she knows how much she meant to you even though you didn't see each other all that much and I'm sure she's glad she had all those special moments with you all lately. Best wishes to your family.
That's a very touching post Jim. I'm so sorry for your loss. Beautiful photos.
Jimmy,
You have done a beautiful job honoring Vicky's. Siblings always forgive and forget eventually. I just wish I would have met her. We are all spread to far across the country. I hope we are able to get our families together one day soon.I will continue to keep all of you in my prayers.
Jackie
Jim, I'm so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts.
Jim -
I'm saying a few prayers for you & your family. That's a beautiful tribute to your sister. Take care of yourself!
Kathleen
Oh big brother,....beautifully done. Thank you. I know Mousie, mom, and everyone else that reads this will be so glad you did this for her, for her family, for us. What spoken words cannot say right now,....you were able to say with your pictures, as always.
love you,....
...........me........
Beautiful tribute to your beautiful sister Jim. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Jim, I am so sorry for your loss. This was a beautiful tribute to your sister. I will say a prayer for your family.
So sorry to hear about your sister, Jim. I loved looking through all of the old photos - very loving touch from a great brother! Your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Sorry for your Loss Jim
Regards,
Moose
Oh Jim, my heart hurts for you right now. Your photos and your words are a beautiful tribute to a beautiful woman. Let yourself grieve in your own way, in your own time. There is no right or wrong way. I wish you peace my brother and am sending you the biggest hugs all the way from Tennessee!
Love,
Bing
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I wish there was something to say or do to take the pain away. Please know that you are all loved by MANY people. We are here for you!
{{{{HUGS}}}}
Martha
aka sisterwolf
I'm sorry for your loss, Jim.
I am very sorry for your loss, Jim. My thought and prayers are with you and your family.
Robert (RRP)
So, so sorry Jim. This post is a beautiful tribute to her!
Jim - not much else I can say that hasn't already been said. Please know that your friends from the forum are thinking about you. You know if there is anything you need, you can call on us.
Jim this is such a woderful and touching tribute. My sympathies to you and your family for your loss.
Jim,
My thoughts and prayers are with you in this difficult time. Gro
Jim,
I'm very sorry to hear this. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
David (caboose)
Jim, I am so sorry for your loss.
Sending Prayers and Hugs to you and your family.
Dawn
Jim,
I am sorry to hear of you loss, but happy for her peace. You and your family will be preyed for!
Dan (dgrits)
Dear Jim,
Oh Man, I'm so sorry to hear this! My deepest condolences to you and your family.
The pictures are GREAT! I remembered seeing the last one not long ago. I was struck by how radiant and pretty she looked despite her illness. Capturing it was a great gift to her and the family.
I'm just one of so many friends, all over the place, feeling deeply for you at this time.
Shannon
Jim, I wish you and your family peace and prayers.
Regina
Jim~
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Please know that you and your family are in our prayers and if there is anything at all that Mike and I can do for you, please let us know.
Lynda (DPruitt)
Amazing...the power of images to remind us how much we love. Your post is a beautiful rememberence of her spirit and place in your life. Though she may be gone from the earth...she will live on in the memory of those who loved her and love her still.
Thinking of you and your family with Love & Prayers during this difficult time. I am glad for the memories you have, even though they may be few, they will last forever.
I am so sorry to hear about your sister. I'm praying for you and your family
many blessings to you Jim and to your family. This documentary is just spectacular!!
-keith and denise olson
What a blessing she had to have you in her life dude...I'd love to meet Cancer in a dark alley one day... Only one of us would come out standing... And I'm pretty sure it would be me.
Thoughts and prayers are with ya today my friend.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. What a beautiful tribute to her.
Kara
(KaraS from mpix)
Jim, My heart and prayers for your family. What a lovely tribute to her. You did well. {{HUGS}}
~Shelly
My thoughts are with you and your family tonight!
I can't tell you all how much it means to me to read all of these posts. Me and my family thank you all so much. If I could I would give you all hugs right now, so here is a virtual hug for each and every one of you.
Oh, Jim, I'm so very sorry for the loss of your sister. I truly enjoyed all the beautiful photos.
-julieinkc
Jim,
My thought are with you and I am sorry to hear of Vicky's passing. You have done a remarkable tribute by sharing her photo and story here and we all appreciate it. I know Vicky appreciated it just by the way she smiling in those photos. Gimme a ring if you need to get away and photograph some birds or just chat.
Cheers my friend,
Al
Hi Jim,
I've been out all day and just saw this. SO SORRY to hear about your sis. What a touching blog post. Many hugs from my family to yours. Let us know if you need anything.
Hi Jim,
I'm so sorry for your loss, my thoughts are with you and your family right now.
Hi Jim, I am sorry for your loss. I was wondering about your sister after our short conversation yesterday. My thoughts & prayers are with you. The pictures you posted are truley beautiful! Thanks for sharing.
Jim my thought and prayers for you and your family to help heal the space that she left.
I can assure you from actual experience cancer is so rude. A couple of seasons ago, baseball had ended before travel baseball began, followed by of course football. I could not get in a comfortable position to sleep. I shoulder would make me and I would move long enough to get in another position to be awakened by the pain again. My wife said go to the doctor get it checked out. X-Rays were ordered, the results a mass in my right lung. Then all of other tests to see what the mass is CTscans, MRis, PET scans. An MRI revealed not only a mass in my lungs, but also in my kidney and adrenal glands. Then a biopsy and the wait. The wait is a pre-op room has to be one of the most lonely feelings that lovely gown, the footies with rubber grip on the bottom to keep you from doing the electric slide from the pre op to the OR> The pulmonologist said "I will get you the results as soon as I can, Thursday, comes and goes not word or results, Friday the same, I finally made an appointment, the mass is Stage 1 cancer. I had lung surgery and a portion of the lung was removed and some lymph grands another confirmation Stage 1 cancer. Then the next series, dealing with the kidney and adrenal glad masses. More STscans more, MRIs and biopsies.travel to the appointments was difficult since some of the tests were done 45 minutes to an hour from my home. The kidney cancer was removed, the urologist said the growth was on the exterior of my kidney, and he pulled my liver out and removed the growths and put it back inside
This is not a whine I am lucky, lucky I have had follow up CTScans that show no new growth.
I might add that not one time did I hear my wife complain about getting up at 1:30 to be at the hospital by 3;00 AM, taking time to make sure when I could not drive that I had the things I wanted her at home so I could be comfortable. A few weeks back back was our 50th wedding anniversary. Ironically it was spent helping my daughter move to a new home, and neither of us regretting it for a moments. At the same time trying to keep up with normal family activities, getting my grandsons to games, practice, helping me do all of the normal things done that until I recovered I could not accomplish. If am blessed to have a wonderful wife, wonderful daughter who is a single parent with two great 17 yr old high school seniors. I am blessed to have people who kept me and my family in their prayers. You find out how close your friends are during these times, some are them lead such busy lives as we all do. It was amazing how many people I never suspected knew or took an interest in my care and recovery. My passions are making sure my family is taken care of, my grand kids have gas or I can get the flat time tire repaired on their car. Making sure they have clothes to wear that does not resemble a rain on the Goodwill container. I found that after the partial lung removal I don't have as much stamina as I did.
I know this is long but cancer can change you outlook and perspective on life
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